Agree With Me Or Else. Or Else What? Exactly.

Upon picking up Tanya at Petsmart, from "doggie daycare" (part of her learning-to-work-well-with-others practice), I found myself staring at a Brownie-Girl Scout cookie table. Now I'm not one of those who is swayed easily by doe-eyed children selling chocolate for their basketball team or ski trip or whatever. I try not to be a total bitch, of course, so a lot of the time, I'll say "No thanks" when what I really mean is "Take your chocolate and shove it because I know it's all just an elaborate scam for your chocolate pimp." Not to put too fine a point on it.

But I approached the table. For one, the mother and daughter just smiled at me when I walked in, didn't jump on me screeching, "Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?" Just because they're Brownie-Girl Scouts, doesn't mean they aren't capable of freaking me out, which is what happens when they scream at me like that. Second, the girl looked just like my niece, whom I adore. And third, she was dressed up as a Brownie bite. The costuming, something I remember at least aspiring to when I myself was a Brownie-and-Girl Scout, put me over the edge. This girl was obviously dedicated to the fine art of cookie selling. And so, I approached.

Right away, I knew this little girl was kick ass because she knelt down and started petting Tanya, who actually nuzzled up to her. I couldn't believe it. The dog who hates children was nuzzling one. Incredible. Or, as it's said in Portuguese, incredible.

I talked with her mother for a while and learned that she was trying to win the most cookies sold this year in order to be the one who gets to throw out the first pitch at Dodger's Stadium. Wow, that's so cool, I said. When I was a Girl Scout, I think the winner of the most cookies got to have a pizza party at Chuckee Cheese with five friends. The Girl Scouts have obviously evolved since I counted myself as one of their ranks.

I bought a box of Samoas, which I believe are the best of all Girl Scout Cookies. Disagree if you dare. But I challenge anyone to prove that any of the other cookies are as delicious, as perfectly conceived, as the Samoa. What could be better than a chewy coconut mixed in with chocolate casing and drizzled with chocolate on top?

Help the coolest Brownie in the world win the most cookie sales by purchasing all your cookily-goodness at the Petsmart off of Foothill in Pasadena. By the Best Buy and the Gold Line station. I told her mom that I'd get the word out about helping her win and as you know, I always keep my promises. Girl Scout's honor.